Lucy

She's out on the terrace now, enjoying the balmy weather. I'm pretty sure she's stopped eating (and possibly drinking water). Today I thought she was going to pass away (and she might tonight). Tomorrow I'm taking her to the vet (dead or alive). It would be cruel of me to leave her here in the apartment while I go off to work, considering the deteriorating condition she's in. I think the only way she survived the weekend is that she knew I was here and was looking after her.

I could stay home from work but don't see what purpose that would serve, since Lucy is only getting worse and is obviously suffering now. She can barely walk. Now she dreads my going off to work (she had begun sitting on the bathroom rug while I'm showering and getting ready), since she gets no attention during the day (B. had given her lots of attention).

What I'm saying is that she'll probably be put to sleep tomorrow. I think it's the best thing. We've been together for 14 years. It will be a huge loss for me but I think it's best for her.